Recently I was chatting to a couple that had been together for almost six years.
In that time, they had gone through many milestones;
They had celebrated many birthdays together, of their friends, families and each other.
They had moved in together, and changed houses more times than they care to count.
They had gone through career changes, and celebrated progressions, promotions, and the start of new ventures.
They had purchased a cat, a couple of dogs, a car, a house, and yet, they had not yet celebrated the purchase of an engagement ring.
Now, as a jeweller, you might think that I would be pushing them to do so, but that’s not how I operate.
Through my 45 years of experience, I gain so much satisfaction and fulfillment by being part of their love story, not necessarily, celebrating the ‘sale’ of a piece of jewellery – it never feels like that, and I know that the day it does, that’ll be the time to change lanes and do something else.
Good news is, I don’t see that happening ever 😂
Anyway, I have been speaking to the man and his partner a fair few times, and he is in talks with me about how to create the perfect ring for his partner, but one thing that I wanted to stand out, her approach to ‘dropping the hint’ was doneso in a really smooth manner – she is in sales after all haha!
You see, it was never about his devotion to her, nor was it about getting cold feet, or commitment problems – he just was operating on his own timeline of being ready.
They had renovations to their home, travel, and business investments they had to take care of, but the thing is, there is always something to do.
I don’t like blanket statements, but in recent years, I’ve found that the males are, shall I say, ‘gently nudged’ to make that next step – it’s more of an open discussion than it has been in years past, and I’m all for that!
Here’s a few things I’ve learnt from this particular couple that I think the female (or male), that want to move the proposal process up a little further.
Couples are moving in earlier together, so the marriage proposal has changed over the years, it’s become more of an open conversation, and collective decision – more people are moving in as a de facto couple before getting married
Sometimes its easy to get complacent and comfortable in the relationship
Boys will be boys, from experience we typically see the guy has gotten a bit of a nudge from his partner, their families, or their mutual friends at social gatherings and barbeques
The key for the woman is to have fun with it, and create open dialogue about building their future together
Some great ways to drop the hint after these conversations is tagging their partner in ring designs they like with some cheeky comments, and lots of emoji’s 😉
Don’t make dropping the hint too serious, too pushy, or with the edge of an ultimatum – everyone has their time, and there’s lots to consider when starting the next chapter of your lives together
Talk openly about finances and expectations, make sure they know that you don’t just want a piece of jewellery, it’s a beautiful momento that celebrates growth in the relationship
Don’t be afraid to involve them in the design process either, I talk to plenty of couples that pick the design before planning a surprise proposal at a date unknown to her.
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ps. if you or anybody you know is looking for an engagement ring, but is a bit wary of walking around retailers at the moment, I’m doing meetings via Zoom videos.
Naturally, it’s totally contactless, but my clients are finding it to be a really good experience because I can share my screens with the designs, and they can easily duck out and set the meeting up with a lot of convenience.